Sweet, Savory and Bite-Sized...

When I was in the 6th grade girls had to take Home Ec and Shop was a 'boys only' class complete with legendary tales of tragic mishaps. (Yes, I am THAT old)  Of course, this was soooo unfair because at the age of twelve I had built a spectacular two-story tree house, but the cider drink I concocted made a classmate quite ill.  Tragic mishaps, indeed.

Well, time changes many things.  Today I keep my feet on the ground.  In fact, if you see me in a tree these days it means I was scooped up and dropped there by an exceedingly large raptor, but, if you are looking for me after work you'll likely find me in the kitchen.  I now LOVE to cook.  I not only love to cook, I love to read about cooking, I love to talk about cooking and I love to watch cooking shows.  I especially enjoy watching cooking shows while cooking.  My favorite is to watch Iron Chef while pretending to be in my own 'kitchen stadium', chopping, sauteing and deglazing along with Iron Chef Morimoto and Iron Chef Cat Cora.  My secret ingredient is never very exotic, usually chicken, but I fancy myself to be quite creative and enjoy presenting something new to my family and friends and then waiting for the feedback from my 'judges'.

(Which reminds me, this weekend one of the guest judges doled out the BEST lines of feedback I have heard in many seasons... I'll tell you later.)

Let's get back to my dinner table.  After giving my 'judges' a few moments to savor my culinary offering I start soliciting their thoughts, impressions, criticism and, of course, praise.  I'll admit it, I'd rather hear that I am going to enter the ranks of the Iron Chefs than that I need to go back to being chief pot scrubber, but I am open to all feedback because, I may have mentioned earlier, I LOVE cooking.  I want to be the very best at it that I can possibly be and the only way to truly excel at something is through methodical mastery, continuing to take it to the next level. 


Those of you who coach others know that there are two types of feedback; immediate and deferred.  Deferred comes after the act.  It's like the restaurant critics review that appears in next months issue of Food & Wine magazine.  Immediate is right in the moment.  More like the critic spitting out a mouthful of your chicken pot pie into her napkin... loudly.  Which is going to have a greater impact?  Yup, I'd be scrambling to whip up a different dish really quickly after whisking away that loaded linen.


Another difference is that deferred feedback may address several items.  It's reviewing last Sundays dinner course by course;The salad was so fresh, the roast quite juicy, but the pie was a bit burned.  While immediate feedback is usually about one thing; Hey!  The soup needs more salt.


Both types of feedback are valuable and I will discuss deferred in more detail in a future blog.  My experience has shown me that deferred feedback is actually happening in most organizations, though usually not as often, or as structured, as it ought to be to derive the optimal results.  I want to focus on immediate right now because it gets you the most bang for your coaching buck.  It is like a platter of perfect little appetizers, people keep coming back for more.  You can mix in all sorts of flavors and textures, in small amounts, and get people to try things they would never tolerate in huge helpings.  Incredibly rich or cloyingly sweet, when offered in tiny, easily consumed portions, you can introduce new ideas and concepts and reinforce positive habits and behaviors.


Many coaches are challenged to find the time for immediate feedback, but, once you learn how deceptively simple it is, you will realize it takes only moments to provide concise, actionable feedback on the fly.  Just focus on one behavior, state it simply, say why it worked or didn't, and give an example of how to do it differently next time.  For example; 'Chef Cora, I noticed that you didn't take the time to let the steaks rest before you cut them.  As a result, the juices weren't able to distribute properly and the meat was dry.  Next time, be sure to set aside 8-10 minutes for the meat to sit before slicing.'  (No offense meant to my vegetarian friends)  With practice a coach can deliver immediate feedback in less than a minute, and that is a minute very well spent.


One last thing, and this is really important, just like a perfect meal feedback needs to be balanced.  There is a very specific ratio of constructive to positive feedback that must be followed to insure the best results; 4 to 1.  That is FOUR positive pieces of feedback for every ONE piece of constructive feedback.  There is a simple way to remember the ratio.  Think of a great meal; it's five courses - appetizer, salad, soup, entree and dessert.  One course may be 'not so great' but if the other four are delicious you'll want to eat there again.


That's what we want feedback to be; sweet, savory, and bite-sized, something that leaves them wanting more.


(That awesome feedback from this weekends Iron Chef?  Chef Zakarian got cinnamon candy as his secret ingredient and had to make not just a dessert, but a savory course as well.  One of the judges, after acknowledging what a challenging task it was to use Red Hots with meat, tasted the dish and said, "It's like asking Mozart to play the Kazoo in a marching band... and can YOU play the kazoo!  It's fantastic!!"  Now that's the kind of immediate feedback a person won't soon forget.)

If you'd like to know more about creating and administering a successful coaching program, or want to swap recipes, please drop me a comment below.